Loving life in Portland, Oregon

Dear E,
My partner and I have just moved into a new space overall, we are loving it and making it feel our own. However, sometimes after exploring a yard sale by herself my partner comes home with an item that I don't particular like. I'm not much of a shopper and I only like to go to yard sales occasionally not every weekend. Sometimes, I would rather recycle the piece than have something I don't particular like in our new home. This annoys her since she spent time and energy picking it out. Grudgingly we usually come up with a compromise that doesn't necessarily satisfy either one of us. Any suggestions?
Loving life in Portland, Oregon

Dear Loving life in Portland, Oregon,
What a great question!! Whatever your partner has picked up may reflect something about her which is worth looking at and appreciating in some way, especially if she took a lot of time to pick it out. Whether it is something practical like a lamp or a piece of artwork to put on the wall, there is something which drew him/her to it. It can be difficult to depersonalize the experience AND step back to have an inquiry about it. (What is it about this that calls to you? , Does it remind you of something? Etc. ) Engaging that way might bring you closer. Material objects we have in our homes can come and go with our growth. Think of your home as a giant sculpture. Maybe broadening your perspective will allow you to have the object around for awhile because it may reflect something your partner is working on. And it's giving you a concrete focus for the practice of unconditional love. In addition it might be good to check into your vision about how you want to be in your new home and loosen up a bit. Moving is big and stirs the proverbial pot so remember nesting is primal. Allowing for “stuff which is out of the picture” is wise. HAPPY NESTING!!

Sleepless in Seattle
Dear E,
I have recently into a new condo (and city). The condo I left was the nicest place I had ever lived, and I really came to love it, and completely own the space. I am finding it difficult to FEEL in my new space. I appreciate it, but seem to have no idea how to decorate. I am trying to just practice patience; not "re-creating" any design, feelings or form from my former condo, but I would really like to feel that I can nest and be nurtured in my new space. I don't feel that now. Are there any techniques or exercises I can do to help this process along?
Thank you
Signed--Sleepless in Seattle

Dear Sleepless in Seattle,
I appreciate your “not wanting to re-create” what you had in your lovely former condo. Just be sure your intention for your new place is current. You may have had the primary purpose of your old place to nurture you AND while the new place needs to do that, you may also have the intention to have over friends and family. And maybe not. In any case, take time to feel into your new life and what motivated you to move in the first place. Then envision how each space in your new condo could best serve you, given your intention. If the main purpose is to nurture you , go through each room and imagine how that might happen there. To enter that process you might find your favorite detail of the room and then build on that. For example, it might be a window in the living room where the morning sun shines in. Maybe you would like to sit in that patch of sun , so you put a chair there. Play with what comes up, experimenting with relating to that one place and see what unfolds. After doing your visioning, invite a friend or family member you are close to over to do a walk through ceremony stating your vision for each space. You might use a bell or incense or sage , whatever you like to anchor the experience in a meaningful way for you.
Best , E